Along with 50 shades of graying, there are at least 50 shades of women’s sexuality--all the way from my 80 year old Aunt, who couldn’t go long without a man--When her husband died she found a new lover at his funeral-- to Saint Teresa of Avila, who married Jesus who filled her with his spirit and gave her “ecstasy” (her word).

Regular sex, according to researchers, sex experts, and Dr. Oz, helps you live longer. If you do not have a partner, you are not out of luck. Bernini’s famous sculpture, The Ecstasy of Saint Teresa, can represent any woman’s orgasm, even if, like Saint Teresa, she has them, in dreams.

Orgasmic dreams can rival if not surpass partnership sex. Here are a couple of testimonies on the Forum of Women-Health.com:

It doesn't seem to coincide with a specific dream…. The orgasms are amazingly intense, almost full body, and nothing like I've experienced during sex or masturbation, and even those are pretty intense.

I would be deep in sleep, dreaming apparently, and then have these INTENSE orgasms while still about 85% asleep! And, I am not touching myself in anyway either!

Women, young and old, can have a robust sex-life with or without a partner. Due to our traditional culture, older women may be too inhibited for auto-erotic or dream-state sex. My advice? Get over it.
Wanda Fullner

We are independent, we are not afraid to be alone...we have a world of friends on our laptops and ipads and phones and computers ....but there is nothing in the Universe that can replace a warm hug, a loving "it's OK" embrace, a human heart that feels your heart. Arm's are loving extensions of our hearts...they are meant for hugging.

Melba Walton

 

There was another life that I might have had, but I am having this one.
Kazuo Ishiguro

“Downward Dog”

Closed Leaf,
my nose in your smell on the mat.
Dog hair where
we did doga—dear departed.
A sigh, a sob.
I look at you snoring on the sofa.
Thirteen years.
I must stop grieving you
before you’re gone.
Ariele M. Huff

I’ve been told no one can define love, but I think the opposite, that everyone can and does, every day.
    When we talk about love over fifty, pets are a big part of that. Of course, they are at every age for some people. But so many of us—when left by spouses and children—don’t have the desire or energy to find another mate or lover. Sole companions many times, our cats, dogs, birds, fish, snakes, pigs, horses, or chickens become our lifelines to love. They provide touch—so precious. They listen when we talk, watch us, and count on us.
    In jails, prisoners turn to wild birds, mice, rats, whatever will come close, whatever will make some kind of contact. In the prison of depression, illness, lack of mobility, we discover other things to comfort us: pets, plants, television, social media. And then, we love them, it, those with an affection borne of propinquity—and more. With an affection that recognizes the need to feel affection that overreaches rules and custom.
    One day, my mother had a special fly—visiting her as she wrote. She saw intelligence and felt connected—a kindred soul buzzing through the veil of tears.
    May you find and enjoy loving something living today.

“Dancing”

Kamill, a boy I liked, was a good dancer who enjoyed it and knew how to lead. At about 14 years old, I realized I also liked to dance.

It was a popularity contest. If you were asked to dance a lot, and boys kept cutting in just to get a chance to be with you, it showed you were "light on your feet" or had a personality that attracted boys' attention. I liked dancing with boys who were taller than I was and who could lead well. And I discovered I liked being in the arms of someone who guided me in such a way that I could anticipate his next move so we could sway to the rhythm of the music in unison.

I loved the sensation of being led by someone smoothly, gently but decidedly. "Let the
man lead, and give yourself over to him” are some of the secrets of good dancing, because,
ultimately, it depends on his skills.

I spent many nights dancing with many different young and not so young men, but never became tired of the sensation. In a way, it is like good foreplay, a legitimate tactic for being embraced by someone in public. Add some romantic music, mood lighting, and a couple of drinks, and you have all the ingredients for dizzying feelings unlike anything else.

Kamill and I were young and very proper, however.

 ©2009 by Marta Boros Horvath  Stories from Hungary